Taking off on a long flight. Remember to charge all devices.
Oh, you just got back from Canada? Tell me all about exotic foreign cultures.
Nail clippers not allowed past security checkpoint. Steak knives available at restaurants inside the terminal.
Can’t bring on plane, might be explosives. Place in trash can next to security line.
Neighbors on plane, y u no shut up when I put headphones on?
One does not simply pass through security.
Americans abroad, y u no try speak the language?
Late for flight. Singled out for ‘pat down.’
Expats: we didn’t want you anyway.